When I Pray I Feel...

     I'm feeling the blah's of a busy season and when I pray there's no magic relief!   I wish there was, but there's not.  When my Dad was dying, I prayed and the journey didn't get easy.  I wish it did, but it didn't.  When people are stressful (I call them EGR - extra grace required -- people & situations) I pray, often for them, and God's way of love and for me, and they don't suddenly get all warm and fuzzy or compliant.  I wish it were so, but it isn't.  So why pray?
      I pray to stay connected to God...something bigger than me. (Here's some info about prayer.)  It seems to me that a God big enough to love me with amazing creativity in creation, persistence in Jesus, and effectiveness over thousands of years, is someone who's got a better handle on things that I do.  (And I haven't found a better handle on life stuff.)  So I want to stay connected.  In that desire, practice and journey, I get changed for the better.  God does stuff that I couldn't see before.  And I find prayers answered in familiar and surprising ways.
      I pray to let God change me.  I need you to know I'm not an on-my-knees, head-bowed, hands-folded, kind of pray-er.  I walk and pray.  I write and pray.  I draw and pray.  I play music and pray.  I think and pray.  I cry and pray.  I sigh and  pray. And, once in a while, I bow-my-head-fold-my-hands and pray.  (Here's some back info on ways to pray.)  It's messy, sometimes mundane, often without immediate reward, frequently one step in a long journey, and always (in hindsight) powerful.

     Today I am wrestling with life on the inside of my head and soul.  I came across an article called "Why Pray?"  and was reminded to pray.  I was connected to God through a prayer: while reading the article, while writing this blog post, while waiting in my own discomfort, and while thinking about practical solutions to life's stuff.  Maybe I need to go take a walk?!  Thanks for starting my prayer time with me.
     If you want to:

• engage about prayer, 
• share a thought about prayer, 
• know someone else is praying with you for a prayer request, 
• offer a strongly or wonderingly held belief about prayer, 
• pursue a sincere question about prayer, 
• confront a deal-breaking or heart-breaking frustration about prayer,

... anything, then go ahead, right now, right here.  I'd love to share in that holy, prayerful conversation with you. Peace on the Journey.